But I tend to bore easily. With some things, not all. And sometimes its not just boredom, it’s being incredibly antsy and restless.
Yesterday was a prime example. I thought I was going to explode from monotony and splatter all over the spreadsheet I was working on. All.Day.Long. But I reminded myself how fortunate I was during these crazy times to have a job that pays me to sit behind a desk and enter numbers. All.Day.Long. That helped.
But really, I think my restless tendancies mean one of two things. I am either a genius who needs constant mental stimulation and challenges, or I have a major character flaw. Or two. I’m leaning toward the later.
I’ve had a few jobs in my life and guess what, I get bored with them after about 6 months to a year. No matter what it is. And for this reason I find myself constantly searching for that one thing that will consistently keep me occupied, satisfied and fulfilled. I haven’t found it yet (at least not that pays the bills) and I’m envious of those people who do what they love every day and are “settled” in careers or lifestyles that suit them. I guess what I envy most about them is their state of contentment in general.
I seem to try different things that I think will solve all my issues and think that if I could only do this or that, then I’ll be completely happy. I wander around in that lovely initial state of learning a new thing or doing something different and all is great for a while. Until I get bored and start searching for the next distraction.
Enter my obligatory qualifying statement here…Don’t get me wrong. I have a fabulous and blessed life and I realize this. But I guess I compartmentalize my life and fret over the parts that aren’t what I want them to be. Great marriage – check, beautiful child – check, family & friends who love me – check, etc. And then there are the other pieces that need a little and some need major tweaking. Not just career issues but some other things I won’t be mentioning here. I suppose I need to realize that nobody’s life is perfect and I should focus on the great parts, of which there are many.
This is going nowhere I guess but was just on my mind.